Scott McKeen
The Edmonton Journal

Friday, March 30, 2007

Paul Brown can explain those lapses in common sense, dignity and decency that paved his way to success.

"I'm an idiot," says Brown, star of The Bear radio's on-air bazaar of bawdy, boyish and self-destructive comedy.

Thus, the idiot's been kidney-punched by a ranked woman boxer, willingly hooked electrodes to his genitals and donned women's frillies for a dunk-tank bit.

Fans have undergone penile piercing, butt branding and same-sex hetero marriage to win one of Brown's on-air contests.

He once caused a public riot. Another time he tricked a woman listener into eating a pubic-hair sandwich. The latter two incidents were during his early days in radio. Each one got him fired.

"Yeah, I'm an idiot."

Paul Brown was born to an Oxford-schooled father and graceful, soft-spoken mother. His brother is a doctor. His sister was top of her class at Queens. But when Paul Brown graduated high school, he swore he'd never set foot in a classroom again.

"I hated school," he says. "I had terrible grades. It wasn't that I found it difficult. It bored me."

He claims to get the same queasy feeling walking into schools as he does hospitals. And libraries.

Yet,here he is at 31 in the top of his class of Edmonton radio personalities. He drives an expensive car, smokes Cuban cigars and lives in a swank downtown loft.

He's married to Allison, a beautiful woman so sweet by nature that people who meet her are struck with an immediate question: "You married HIM?"

A couple of years ago, Brown got a new camera cellphone. He clicked a picture of Allison's naked chest, a sweet token of their love.

She made him promise to not show the picture to anyone.

That night was The Bear's office party. Paul went early and by the time Allison arrived it became immediately obvious to her that Paul had been flashing her breasts all over town. Allison was furious. So what did Paul do? He called her the next morning, live and on-air, to talk about the incident.

"I thought it would make a great bit," he says. "Yeah, I'm an idiot."

The Bear's morning show includes co-hosts Gillian Foote and Yukon Jack. It's not unusual in the entertainment industry for people to use cool-sounding stage names.

Here's the funny thing. Yukon Jack's real name is Paul Brown. No, really. When this Paul Brown arrived in Edmonton in 2004 to take over The Bear's morning show, he was introduced to that Paul Brown. But that's not even the weirdest coincidence. Both men were born Paul William Brown. What's even stranger is that both were born idiots.

Brown loves to perform. He was the stereotypical class clown in school and grew up in New Brunswick wanting to be a comic and actor. After high school, as his buddies went off to institutions of learning, Brown was a bit lost.

One of his friends, whose dad owned a Fredericton radio station, suggested Paul go into broadcasting. A rare light bulb went off in Brown's head. So he went to the station and was rejected. He was told he needed a diploma in broadcast.

Unbowed, Brown asked if he could practice doing a fake radio show in one of the studios. And that's what he did, a couple of nights a week for six months. He'd be in the studio, spinning records and talking into a mic, to himself.

The program director finally gave in and put him on air. If he hadn't, well, there wouldn't be two Paul Browns on the Paul Brown Show.

"I was terrible," says Brown. "I mumbled a lot."

One night, Brown was reading the weather forecast and reported cool, but clear skies over Fredericton. The problem? A blizzard was blowing outside. Brown had checked the station's weather computer, but failed to look out the window. His boss stormed into the studio and asked a thematic question: Are you an idiot?

In truth, he's become better over time. He's toned things down, a bit. Worked on his voice and timing. But relatively speaking, he's no polished radio guy.

"I have no natural ability," he says. "I'm not smooth, I'm sloppy. In the business, I'm known as the most successful bad broadcaster."

But he works hard. He gets up at 3:30 every morning and often isn't in bed until after midnight. He's either doing the show, a bar gig somewhere or stand-up comedy at the Comic Strip in WEM, where he's hosting a Tuesday-night amateur contest.

He loves performing. He'd rather be on a stage than in any crowd. Groups of people give him the same feeling he gets in schools and libraries. Like he doesn't belong.

Over the past few months I've come to know Brown and Allison. Nice couple. He's actually quite charming. Boyish, yes. But generous, self-deprecating and completely comfortable in his skin.

Brown admits he doesn't think like most of us. He'll come up with a brilliant idea, only to be told by someone, like his wife, that it's tasteless, demeaning, sexist or just dumb. Often, he's surprised by the reaction. What is he, an idiot?

"No, I just play the part," says Paul Brown.

If so, give that man an Oscar.

smckeen@thejournal.canwest.com

WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY, SCOTT?

Scott McKeen will be on Paul Brown's show at 8:20 this morning, on 100.3 The Bear.
© The Edmonton Journal 2007


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